Being in an intimate relationship is very rewarding and also very challenging. How can it be that the one we love most, is the one that can hurt us the easiest? Seems a bit unfair…….
Relationship is actually where we can work out many of our issues from the past. Not being in an intimate relationship often means there is no one to ‘press our buttons’. While we have longing for intimacy, we do not long for the other side of it, which is how quickly we can feel hurt by our partner. In relationship we can feel totally blissful and loved and we can also feel infuriated, unheard, criticised or unimportant. These last feelings are very deep and painful and when we feel them, we blame our partner for making us feel this way. This response of blame on the other, actually can leave us feeling like we are at their mercy NOT to feel like this again, a sense of not being in control of our emotional responses.
Gestalt therapy is a gentle yet incredibly effective way of finding out where these feelings come from and what they are about. Exploring these feelings can provide you with knowledge and awareness which can take the blame off your partner and allows you to be choicefull about your emotional responses.
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