Reconciled couple smiling at each other

Can Marriage Counselling Save Your Marriage?

Are you considering marriage counselling to improve your relationship? Every relationship faces times of conflict or difficulty, and it is not at all uncommon for couples to feel that they aren’t connecting.

Marriage counselling with an experienced and compassionate counsellor can assist couples to work through their differences, improve their communication skills, and rebuild trust within their relationship.

What Issues Can Marriage Counselling Help To Address?

There are many issues that can affect a romantic relationship, especially a long term one such as a marriage. Whether you have been married for one year or forty, problems can arise as both people grow and change, and the external pressures of life take their toll.

Some of the common marriage issues that can lead a couple to seek marriage counselling include:

  • Lack of intimacy. A loss or lack of sexual desire within a marriage is not uncommon. Most long-term relationships will experience peaks and troughs in sexual activity, but a lack of intimate connection can put a strain on the relationship.
  • Infidelity. Affairs or incidents of infidelity can create feelings of insecurity, betrayal and a loss of trust within a couple.
  • Infertility. Difficulty conceiving or the lack of ability to conceive can be devastating for a couple, and the strain of this can put pressure on the marriage. Common problems include feelings of blame and breakdowns in communication.
  • Pressure from society or family. When a person’s family disapprove of their relationship or partner, it can make the marriage difficult. This is especially felt within same-sex marriages.
  • Children. The introduction of children, or the normal pressures associated with raising children through different stages of life, can cause conflict in a marriage. Disagreements about how to approach parenthood are common.
  • Mental illness. When one or both members of the marriage are experiencing mental illness, it can be difficult for the other person in the relationship to navigate and understand.
  • Ageing parents. Many people who are married will eventually cope with the ageing of their parents and parents-in-law. Decisions around caring can cause disagreements in a relationship.

How Can Marriage Counselling Save A Relationship?

Even if you are experiencing a myriad of marriage issues and feel that your relationship is under threat, marriage counselling can help to save your marriage and return the love and joy to your relationship.

When you are within a relationship, it can be hard to objectively consider your problems. Communicating with your spouse can become difficult if conversations often lead to arguments. But when you visit a marriage counsellor, you are given the opportunity to talk freely with an experienced counsellor to guide you. Counsellors create a safe environment where both people feel able to share their thoughts and feelings. In this non-judgmental space, couples can often open up about their true concerns and communicate more effectively with each other.

Couples experiencing stress can often harbour feelings of resentment and frustration towards their spouse. These negative feelings can be toxic to a marriage. But in a counselling session, couples are able to unburden these feelings and be guided to understand their true cause. Issues such as infidelity or lack of intimacy are tackled without prejudice or judgement, with the aim of moving past these problems and rebuilding trust in the marriage.

What To Expect At A Marriage Counselling Session

Many people can be apprehensive about pursuing marriage counselling, but the counsellors at Perth Counselling & Psychotherapy will ensure you feel comfortable and safe to open up when you visit us for a session.

When you attend marriage counselling, your counsellor will begin by gaining an understanding of your relationship and any problems and issues you are experiencing. Both people in the relationship will be asked to explain their thoughts and feelings about what has brought them there. Your counsellor will also strive to understand the history of your relationship, including how you met, why you were drawn to each other, and any important milestones in your marriage. They will get to know your individual histories and life experiences, so they can know if any significant events may be impacting your present relationship.

While your counsellor will spend most of their time listening and inviting you to share your thoughts on what you want to achieve and what potential issues you see in your own behaviour and those of your partner, they will also be proactive in providing feedback and sharing their own thoughts. Any escalations towards arguments will be gently interrupted so you can both stay focussed and work together to address issues in a productive way.

Marriage counsellors will also offer couples advice and tips for improving the problem areas of their marriage. Utilising their wealth of experience, they can provide impartial feedback, which couples can put into action when they return home. If the couple is committed to putting in the work and trusting in the process, almost any troubled relationship can be saved.

If you feel like you could benefit from marriage counselling in Perth, or you want to find out more, please contact us for a discussion.

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As restrictions surrounding COVID-19 begin to ease in Western Australia, Perth Counselling and Psychotherapy is once again offering face-to-face sessions, in addition to online sessions. For those of you visiting us in-person, rest assured that we are strictly following social distancing regulations and will not have any physical contact with clients. If you have any questions, please contact your therapist for more information.